I slept in this morning.
Roger and I decided, at the last minute to go to one of our favorite spots for brunch; the weather couldn’t have been better. We shared bagels and smoked salmon and splurged on some home made ice cream. It seems like it’s been a long while since we’ve taken time out like this. It’s now 3:30 in the afternoon and I’m just sitting down to prepare this post on the ways we sabotage our inner peace.
Some might have said this detour from my work was a frivolous waste of time; I could have had this post finished, and perhaps ticked a few additional items off my todo list. From my point of calm, I can see how pushing myself hard over the past few months has cost me. As I write, I think of some of the ways I’ve sabotaged my own inner peace. Here’s what I’ve been up to:
I’ve moved away from doing yoga first thing in the morning in favor of writing. I used to light a candle, tap on a yoga playlist and enjoy my coffee a bit before moving into my favorite yoga poses and stretches. After, I’d meditate and seek direction for my day. I felt a strong sense of focus and direction and often gained new insights and ideas. I loved being in the creative flow.
Now I get up and scroll my Facebook and Instagram feeds to see what happened during the night. (I haven’t gone so far as to watch the news…yet…) I grab a cup of coffee and begin writing. I work until mid morning, when I start feeling overwhelmed and unsure what to tackle next. I get off on all sorts of tangents then feel crazed when I discover I’ve gone off track and got far less work done than I wanted. Looking out the window, I note another beautiful day has passed and not only have I gotten little done, I’ve also wasted a lovely day.
I used to begin my shower dry brushing, then gently rubbing my body with healing oils. It was both invigorating and calming. Dry brushing is said to increase circulation and improve our skin—to me it just feels good.
These days, I’m in a rush to get through my shower, get my makeup on—if I even bother with it, and get out to write, plan, market my blog or plan a photo shoot. The day is too short and my todo list too long to dally.
Oh, and I used to take a relaxing soak in my tub in the evening two times a week-I’d sprinkle in Epsom salts, turn on some music, light some candles, and soak for about 20 minutes. I’d put on a pretty night gown and enjoy watching tv with Roger. I’ve put that aside too. Busy, busy…
Sometimes I wonder how much time it actually takes to do these extra things for my self, especially when I consider how important it is to spend my time scrolling social media or playing my favorite computer game. From my spot slouched on the couch, the extra effort seems a lot.
Roger and I used to pack a picnic lunch, grab our notebooks and IPads and head for the park. We’d sit half a day just watching squirrels and birds. Ideas seemed to flow so easily from those quiet days surrounded by nature.
Now I sit at a messy table with piles of papers, magazines, bills and notes to myself. Oh, and because I’m starting to take supplements again, I’ve added a bunch of vitamin bottles to the mix. It’s a hot mess, but I’m sure it won’t affect my productivity or feelings of being overwhelmed…at all.
Speaking of which, little housekeeping items keep niggling at me. I used to clean as I moved through the house, and made a point of targeting one section of the house per day, spending about 20 minutes giving it a shine and polish which was enough to keep things well in check. Lately, I’ve been “too busy”, and find myself irritated by the mess.
I used to take great joy in preparing healthy meals for my family; now I make quick sandwiches or a small plate of cheese and crackers and call it a day. I’ve almost forgotten food can be delicious and sitting down to enjoy a meal, especially with companions, is one of life’s greatest treasures.
Life is short, the world is an amazing place and we are surrounded with opportunities to add richness and joy to our lives and the lives of others. I’m wrapping this up, clearing the table and setting out a candle for tomorrow morning. I hope you’ll take a little time out to add self care into your life.
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