• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Nina Anders

Living an Ageless Life With Style

  • About
    • Privacy Policy
    • Cookie Policy
  • EBook
  • Shop My Favorites
  • Beauty
  • Fashion
  • Lifestyle
    • Inspiration
    • Morning Musings
    • My Almost Empty Nest

Life After Alcohol: Part 4

12/05/2018 · In: Lifestyle

I quit! text over top of splashing glass of wine

After a great deal of soul searching, I decided to post this four part series on why, how and what happened when I quit drinking alcohol four years ago. Neither Roger, nor my daughter Brooke are completely comfortable with my decision to share this, but I feel drawn to. It is my hope that if you feel uncomfortable with how much alcohol you drink, you will know you are not alone-I’ve been there. And if you are concerned about what stopping might be like, I can at least share what stopping was like for me and how I did it. If you wonder how your life might change after you stop, I am sharing the ups and downs I encountered after I quit.

I made the decision to stop drinking, but that may not be the right decision for you, or you may want to but it may not be the right time. Whether you drink or not, this is a no judgement zone. This is the last post of the series, next week, we will be on to new things.

Life Changed Fast:

My doctor had helped me deal with my thyroid issues, some vitamin deficiencies and I felt like a new person physically. The better I felt, the   more clear it was that I was drinking too much, and that it was affecting my health.  I also knew my marriage was in serious trouble.

We’d been in therapy, we’d talked and talked, but nothing changed. Our issues remained unresolved which meant that I had to accept the status quo or leave. I chose to leave. We met with an attorney and began proceedings, and put our home of 25 years up for sale. Four months later, our home had sold, and Brooke and I moved into a place of our own. Our divorce was finalized and it seemed as if over night, I was living a completely different life.

I enjoyed the quiet of my new home and took  time to heal, meditate and practice yoga. Brooke was out and about with her friends, and needed far less from me. On the business front, things were quiet. Several of the projects I worked on were finalized and I was at loose ends. For the first time in 20 years, I had the luxury of time to think and just “be”.

Most all of my old friends drank at least moderately, and many drank heavily. Cocktail parties were a fixture in our circles. After quitting drinking, I was reluctant to tell anyone. I was afraid my friendships would change. I had seen my father’s friend circle change after he quit drinking, I had even seen him heckled by some of his friends who weren’t in support of his decision not to drink anymore.  Some people litterally shut him out because they no longer shared drinking as a pastime.

As a result, I found all sorts of tricky methods to evade invitations to drink at cocktail and dinner parties. As a sober person I found I didn’t enjoy drinking parties anymore, nor my friends when they were drunk. When drinking wasn’t a part of the equasion, I began to discover I had little in common with many of them.

When my house sold, and I moved, some of my friends kept in touch via Facebook for a while. But over time, we went our separate ways. This part of sobriety can be hard, espcially if you remain with the same friend group, but for me it seemed easier because the divorce and move put a line under that part of my life.

Living sober has been easy, my boyfriend doesn’t drink and 99% of the time I don’t even think of alcohol or drinking. But, truth be told, once in a while I do. When we go on vacation, I sometimes wish I could enjoy a glass of wine. I used to equate wine with luxury, relaxation, and vacations. I wish, sometimes, I could enjoy a glass of bubbly to celebrate, Champaign reminds me of happy times, celebrations and holidays. (Sometimes we get non alcoholic sparking cider; I like cranberry and apple, when I want to celebrate.)

Because of the way I quit drinking on my own and never “hit rock bottom”, I don’t really know if I was an alcoholic or if I just drank too much and was lucky to quit when I did. It is said that Alcoholics will resume drinking heavily if they drink again. I am uncomfortable not knowing.  I sometimes wonder what would happen if I have alcohol. Would I fall right into it again? Would I still like it?

A few weeks ago, I had a half of a glass of Champaign at a friend’s housewarming party. Instead of feeling warm and happy like I used to, I felt uncomfortable and disconnected. It just didn’t feel good. I guess that chapter is over.

A few notes:

No one explained to me that alcohol, specifically more than four ounces of red wine per day can negatively affect estrogen levels.  Elevated estrogen levels can, in turn, cause breast cancer.  Even though my gynecologist knew I was a high cancer risk, she never mentioned my drinking might be a problem.   It was in switching to a new primary care physician that I learned  I had estrogen dominance.  My estrogen dominance  was very uncomfortable emotionally and I know part of my drinking was to cover up those uncomfortable feelings.  Little did I know that the very thing I used to lessen my symptoms was the very thing that was causing it.

I also used alcohol to numb myself so I didn’t have to take responsibility for my life and make difficult decisions. I  used alcohol to self medicate hormonal imbalances.  Finally, I used alcohol help me relax.  Once I addressed those issues, I was able to walk away from drinking.

What worked for me: I was clear about wanting to live a healthier alcohol free life. Slowly, over time I baby stepped way my to a healthier lifestyle. Finally, I felt ready to address my drinking and decided completely quitting is the best solution for me. Each of us is unique. If you are concerned about your drinking, you may want to check in with your doctor to make sure you don’t have an underlying health issue that may contribute to your desire for more alcohol, pick up Allen Carr’s book, go to therapy, or join an AA group. What ever you decide, may you be blessed and may you live the kind of life you long to live.

———————

Sign up for weekly updates here button

Hey there!  I’d like personally invite you to join our community here at Sharing a Journey.  Grab my free beauty guide and receive weekly updates by clicking the image below.  I chat on Facebook Live every Tuesday night at 7:30 pm eastern time, and am active on Instagram (@sharing_a_journey) and love to play on Pinterest (sharingajourney)  so be sure to follow my boards for my favorite outfits, recipes, decor, seasonal inspiration and travel.

By: Nina · In: Lifestyle · Tagged: Alcoholism, life over 50, wellness

About Nina

Sharing A Journey is an award winning blog for women "of a certain age" who love life and style with a little inspiration mixed in. The blog and it's author Nina Anders has been featured in notable publications including Forbes, Next Avenue, Thrive Global and Parade. Photos by RSEsteyphotography Let's do midlife together!

you’ll also love

Nina Anders over 50 infelucener waring cream sweater and white pantsHow to Create Your Own Personal Style: A Guide for Women
Tidy closetCloset Refresh: Your Guide to a Stylish Wardrobe Reset
GloTech red-light kitHow to Get the Most from Your Red Light Glotech Collar

Join the List

Stay up to date & receive the latest posts in your inbox.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Anna at Muttonstyle says

    12/05/2018 at 12:42 PM

    Thank you for sharing such a personal story. We don’t drink midweek unless it’s social but we can overdo it with friends at weekends. I’ve discovered i quite like Heineken 0.0 now so am offering to drive more.

    Reply
  2. Shelbee on the Edge says

    12/06/2018 at 6:21 AM

    Nina, I am so glad that you were able to share this story. It must be so cathartic for you and will help so many readers as well. I certainly have had my fair share of “drinking to drown the emotions and hide away from life” episodes, but I never actually felt an “urge” to have a drink. If that makes sense. In fact, I generally go months at a time without a drink and relax instead by playing stupid mindless games on my phone like Farm Heroes (I suppose that is sort of an addiction in its own right)! Isn’t it funny how certain friends can no longer remain your fiends when drinking is removed from the equation? I have had friends like that as well and on occasions when I chose not to drink, they would pressure me making me feel like a child again and I would find myself saying, “I’m an adult, I will not succumb to silly peer pressure. Have your drinks. I don’t want any.” In any event, I am no longer friends with those people either and I am better for it, just as you are living your best life now. You are an inspiration, my friend. Keep doing what you do!

    Shelbee
    http://www.shelbeeontheedge.com

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Next Post >

Cozy Sweater Round Up

Primary Sidebar

Meet Nina Anders

Meet Nina Anders
hello!

Welcome to Sharing a Journey! If you love modern classic fashion, videos about beauty and skin care with a little inspiration and lifestyle mixed in, you are in the right place! Grab a cup of coffee, and take a look around.

Read More

Connect

Categories

  • Beauty
  • Fashion
  • Inspiration
  • Lifestyle

Purchase A Copy of Graceful Transitions Here

Advertise

SiteGround Ad

Disclaimer

This site uses affiliated links in some of it’s posts.  Posts with affiliated links will be noted.  Sharing A Journey also receives gifted items provided for review.  When we have received an item for review it will be noted in the post.  As always, our opinions are our own.    Please stop by my About Page to read more about our policies such as copyright, disclaimers, and collaborations. Please Click Here for Our Privacy Policy

Buy Me A Coffee?

https://buymeacoffee.com/ninaanderssharingajourney

Follow Along

@sharing_a_journey

Nina Anders | Sharing a Journey

sharing_a_journey

Life and Style Blog | YouTube Channel

2025 is my year for a Glo Up starting with my skin 2025 is my year for a Glo Up starting with my skin care routine. I just started using the ZIIP Halo on my 65 year old skin.  Cant wait to see the results. #livingmybestlife #over60andfabulous #over50model #over65skincare @ziipbeauty
This week’s mini adventures had us in one of my This week’s mini adventures had us in one of my favorite spots-Dunedin Florida. We went for coffee and croissants at @dunedincoffeecompany where they have amazing coffee and a real in house bakery. Every so often the baker comes through with delicious creations right from the ovens. We went for some design inspiration @lrhome their shop never disappoints then on to the book shop. That made us hungry so we had to go to  @casatinas. How could you not?#livingmybestlife #over60andfabulous #over50womenoninstagram #over50style #outfitoftheday #over50model
I've been making a point to spend a lot less time I've been making a point to spend a lot less time on screens this year. It's been amazing how much free time I have to enjoy new hobbies and spending time with friends and family. I even tried my hand at painting with a Time For Art kit and actually made this sweet dolphin painting. I was surprised how easy it was even for someone like me who has very little painting experience. I loved how the kits came with everything I needed to make the painting, and I when I needed help, I watched a video on the Time for Art website. I thought it would be fun to host some friends for a girls painting night, invitations are in the mail--plus it would make a perfect gift. Be sure to check out @timeforartlive--I will link all their info in my link tree.
For the next 65 Days I am challenging myself to ch For the next 65 Days I am challenging myself to change a few bad habits and prioritize health, friendships and activities that enhance happiness and creativity.  I am looking forward to going into 65 and beyond healthier and happier than ever before. I hope you’ll join me over the next 65 days by choosing something you’d like to improve or a habit you’d like to break and see where it leads. #over50womenoninstagram #over60andfabulous #livingmybestlife
Instagram post 18020842631137506 Instagram post 18020842631137506
Instagram post 17901405167968170 Instagram post 17901405167968170
Load More... Follow on Instagram

Footer

On the Blog

  • Beauty
  • Fashion
  • Inspiration
  • Lifestyle

Info

  • About Nina Anders
  • EBook
  • Shop
  • Work with Me

stay in the know

Copyright © 2025 · Theme by 17th Avenue

We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. By clicking “Accept All”, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. However, you may visit "Cookie Settings" to provide a controlled consent.
Cookie SettingsAccept All
Manage consent

Privacy Overview

This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience.
Necessary
Always Enabled
Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously.
CookieDurationDescription
cookielawinfo-checkbox-analytics11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-functional11 monthsThe cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-necessary11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-others11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other.
cookielawinfo-checkbox-performance11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance".
viewed_cookie_policy11 monthsThe cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. It does not store any personal data.
Functional
Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features.
Performance
Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors.
Analytics
Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc.
Advertisement
Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads.
Others
Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet.
SAVE & ACCEPT