I’ve dreamed many delicious dreams. Held them close. Cherished them fondly. Some I’ve pursued with great vigor, while others crumbled as I tried to hold them in my hands. Some of my dreams have come to fruition, while others never got off the ground.
I am just coming out of a long period of dreams fading and shifting. I have had to re-calibrate, to let go, to start new. It’s hard to let go of dreams, even when we can see they no longer bring us joy or simply haven’t gotten off the ground. Sometimes we encounter barriers, or brick walls; these are clues that we might need to spend a little bit of time looking under the hood to see what’s really going on or chart a new course, maybe.
The truth is, some dreams simply aren’t for us. They are great to think about from a hammock on a warm summer’s day but not for our real lives. Dreams can grow dull over time, losing their luster. We may have pursued other people’s dreams and overtime, lost heart. Knowing when to let go and move on can be tricky. As a card carrying member of the “Help I’m Stuck” club I know this well.
I have learned to embrace the lessons of my dreams rather than shun them. Brick walls are important teachers. I’ve learned to check in and go deep to see what is working and what is not. Dreams can be full of imagery that can be very tricky to decipher. We think we want one thing on the surface, but deep down, we want something else entirely. Seeking the truth what lies beneath the surface helps us navigate to the places that bring us joy, success and fulfillment.
Thinking about the essence of the dream, the why, what’s really at play–is this something that needs to be moved to the fun category rather than a money making venture, for example. Have I discovered this really isn’t for me? Do I only like one part of it, but hate the rest? Am I headed down a rabbit hole, here? Does pursuing this dream fill me with joy? Do I need help from others?
Bringing your dreams to life is a whole other subject…stepping up, stepping forward…the excitement, the fear, everything all at once. I’ve learned to set goals, establish mile stones, begin with the end in mind and work backwards to where I am standing. I have learned not to place the success of my dreams in other people’s hands–like winning a skating completion, for example–you and another skater can do perfect performances, and it comes down to the judge as to who wins. I don’t do that any more. The goal is no longer just to win the competition, it is the experience of doing my best all the way along. To learn and grow stronger. It’s the little picture, moment by moment and the big picture, becoming the best skater I can be, all at the same time. It’s being realistic about my prospects, (clearly, this 58 year old is not going to compete in the Olympics–but there are other amazing and fulfilling things I can do within the skating world–finding my niche—or just enjoying the sport–that’s what I am going for).
We all find ourselves at crossroads from time to time. Whether charting a new course, giving a old dream a makeover or renewing our resolve, this is the stuff of life, moment by moment, the little picture and the big picture all at one time, just living it, not holding anything too tightly–that’s where the joy, success and sweetness of live really is, and where our dreams really come true.
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What a timely and thoughtful post, Nina. It’s a traditional time of the year to make and calibrate our goals, although it’s possible to do that any day of the week – we’re fluid and gliding through this life. You look lovely as per always, and thanks for linking up, xox
-Patti
http://notdeadyetstyle.com
I love this post Nina! I’ve been thinking a lot recently about what I really want in my life. It seems that midlife is a time of serious reflection and refining our dreams…one step at a time, one day at a time! I hope you have a wonderful day!
Hi Suzanne! I have been loving your blog and videos! Thank you so much for stopping by! I agree about midlife—I see it as a renaissance, an opportunity to completely change, fine tune, grow, try new things or reconnect with things we set aside to become wives, raise families, have careers, volunteer in the community—all the amazing things women do—now is the time to take a look with fresh eyes! Hugs! Nina
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So much wisdom in this post! Also, love the sweater! 🙂
It’s true that we should analyze what is working and not working. And changing courses can be a smart thing.
Happy 2018
XOXO
Jodie
http://www.jtouchofstyle.com
Hi Jodie! Happy New Year! We are definitely looking at the good, the bad and the ugly right now and making plans for more good and less bad and ugly here! Happy New Year dear friend.
This outfit makes everyone to dream of summer. Who can wait? Great photos too! Thanks for linking up to Top of the World Style.
Thank you Nicole, Happy New Year! Can’t wait to see your fashions at http://www.highlatitudestyle.com and continue getting to know one another!
My heavens, Nina, this is a moving post! And very inspiring! I agree with you completely on all of it. We are ever evolving beings with the right to change our minds, our opinions, our priorities, and our dreams at any given moment. What works for us today may be a giant failure tomorrow. And that is all okay and all a part of life. The experiences along the way, the lessons we learn, these are what make life so fulfilling and the journey so exciting. Thank you for sharing and for linking up with me!
Shelbee
http://www.shelbeeontheedge.com
And I forgot to mention how brilliant this sweater and the color are on you! I watched your year end video wearing this sweater and it is so stunning on you!
Shelbee
Thank you so much! It’s been fun playing with clothes this year! I feel like a teenager again.??
So many hugs to you. You’ve touched and changed my life too. (I’ve come to be good with failure—these days—I kind of hate the word because when things aren’t working it just means we need to re assess what we are doing. Why we made it into such a bad thing I will never know, it has sure shut down many a creative soul. Hugs, Dear One, Nina
Great post Nina. It is hard sometimes to let go of outdated dreams but holding on to them prevents us from pursuing more fulfilling goals. In my teens I had wanted a career in music but after a term at university studying music I had to admit that it wasn’t for me. It was very painful to come to terms with that and start over, but eventually I found a career better suited to me in broadcasting. Music was good for a hobby but not something I could have enjoyed trying to earn living doing.
Emma xxx
http://www.style-splash.com
Thank you for sharing that, Emma! I am a huge fan of http://www.shtyle-splash.com
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