Getting What You Really Want from Life: A few Easy Questions

What do you really want?

The last week of December had me reviewing the year just past, celebrating the good stuff as well as seeing where I could learn and improve upon going forward. I looked again at my goals and dreams to see what may have changed, where I might fine tune and become more clear.

The first question I asked myself after my review was “what do I really want now?” You can read here about when to change your dreams/goals here..

I think it is of utmost importance to know what one wants in life, to take note of one’s passions, yearnings and leanings. We often head down very different paths in our lives and then at mid life we find ourselves questioning well, everything…

In 2014, I found myself back at the drawing board (yet again). My husband and I had divorced and the business of being someone’s wife and the responsibilities marriage entails were over. While I reveled in doing a giant starfish in my newly empty bed at night, there was no question my life had significantly changed. I was on my own with a teenaged daughter—we all know how scary that can be.

My daughter was becoming increasingly independent, and is now off at college. Even more responsibilities have been lifted from my plate—so much so, I am living a completely different and new life.

This new quiet, open place is a great luxury, I know. It gives me time to think, to pray, to meditate, experiment, reminisce…and to ask questions I haven’t taken the time to ask. It has given me a great opportunity to live a new adventure with tools I could only have dreamed of knowing how to use when I started out as a timid young girl.

What do you really want now? Did you let go of a dream as a young girl that you can now reconnect with? Is there a new vision calling you? Take heed, dear sisters and act. This is your time to shine.

Here are some books I’ve read that have helped me find my way:

Finding Your Own North Star by Martha Beck

Wishcraft How to Get What You Really Want by Barbara Sher

The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron

I’ve been doing Morning Pages from the Artist Way for years off and on, and now I’m working “Artist Dates” into my schedule which is really helping me become more clear as to who I am now and what I want in my life.  Here are a few additional tips that have helped bring me clarity:

1.  My semi-annual house cleaning/clear out.  Mind you, I have a cleaner who cleans my house, but twice a year I dig in deep, and clear out clutter.  The tip:  Take note of what your clutter is telling you.  If you aren’t using things, are you holding on to the past?  
2. If you do a clear out, why are you keeping the things you choose to keep?  What is that telling you about your life and what you might be looking for going forward?
3. Write a “why” for your dreams along with a few next steps.  If you aren’t feeling your old dreams, don’t be afraid to make a new list.
4. Create a little letting go ceremony for yourself.  Put the past behind, celebrating it’s high points and nurturing any hurts you may still be holding.  Consider learning more about forgiveness.  (For me, it’s a process, one I’m still working on.)  The more you can forgive, the more you free up space to live your best life.

You may notice I think a lot about what makes my heart sing and I encourage you to do the same.  The closer we get to our ideal lives, the more we are able to shine brightly and share the gifts we are meant to share at this point in our lives. 

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