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The Secret to Beautiful Hair Over 50 Is Easier Than You Think

07/01/2018 · In: Beauty, Hair

Nina Bandoni of Sharing a journey best hair head shot

Do you worry about having “old lady hair” as you reach age 50 and beyond? This is an important topic, because at some point we all will probably get older, and face the possibility having “old lady” hair. I’ve already had a taste of it, (I’m 58) and for the moment, I’ve staved it off. But let’s get down and dirty here, what is “old lady” hair, and what can we do to combat it?

First, let’s talk about the elephant in the room: as we move into our middle years, lots and lots of things are changing, not the least of which is our hair. It not only does it lose pigment; some of us experience thinning, changes in texture and, over time our scalp produces less oil and our hair can become dehydrated and damaged, all of which can be the fodder of Golden Girl nightmares.

To add to our hair woes, we have people telling us how to style our hair, like our mothers, who got those q-tip like coiffures that required harsh perms and lots of hair spray, not to mention the fact that only a licensed hairstylist could create the look to begin with. And then there are the “rules” from God knows where—“a lady’s hair should be cut to her shoulders or above at age 40 and to the chin at age 50.” I can’t begin to tell you how many times I have heard or read that rule and it’s complete nonsense in my book.

Woman’s blonde hair in pincurls

Let’s talk about hair health first. Our hair and skin are the first place vitamin deficiencies, some health problems, and the side effects of medications show up. If you have experienced hair loss, or dry, brittle hair or any other hair related anomalies, and haven’t been to the doctor for a good check up, including blood work, do not pass go, do not collect $200, go straight to your doctor for a check up. While not all medical hair problems can be fixed, many can, and wouldn’t it be a shame if you had something fixable but went about suffering because you didn’t know it could be as simple as a special shampoo, or vitamins?

Next, we have to talk about how we care for our hair. One of my biggest hair disasters was continuing to allow a hair stylist to highlight my hair every six weeks. My hair simply couldn’t take the strong chemicals she was using. I changed stylists, and my coloring strategy and within a year, my hair was on the mend. It still took over a year to cut off the severe damage (a little at a time), but it’s been four years now and I’ve been able to grow my hair out beyond my shoulders! It’s shiny and healthy again and I love it. (We talk about my seriously “inappropriate” hair length in a little bit.)

At home we can also be contributing to our hair care woes—specifically not using the right shampoo and conditioner for our hair type (I’ve had to do lots of experimenting—I used to have oily hair, then an oily scalp with dry hair, and now I’m in the “normal to dry” category) for the longest time I was using body building shampoo which was actually drying to my hair, so I’ve had to significantly change my shampoo. At this point, I’ve tried shampoos from the drug store and salons and have found a few favorites–they are a bit pricy, but worth it.

This is what I’m using right now:

And then there are hot tools and styling aids both of which can cause serious damage. I try to keep from heat styling my hair more than twice a week, and avoid hairspray and styling products containing alcohol. I also use heat protectant and rub a light amount of oil in the ends of my hair before using heat tools.

Hot tools that are gentle on hair:

Moisture restoring shampoo and conditioner, hair oils, heat protectant, conditioning masks and using a restructuring conditioner before shampooing have all helped to restore my hair’s health. Taking the time to find the right cocktail for your hair type is worth the effort.

Let’s move on to style and color.

We’ve all heard the rules, and if you’ve followed my blog, you know I’m not big on rules, in fact, I hate them. So I’m offering some styling “guidelines” to consider as you evaluate your hair options.

Nina Bandoni at Sharing A Journey having her hair styled

I think we are all old enough to figure out what works for us. Maybe, occasionally, we might be in need of inspiration or an update. We don’t need a rule that says we have to have our hair cut into a pixi, teased into a bouffant or have it tinted with blue rinse to be “appropriate” unless you really want that. With that said, here are some of the questions I see repeatedly:

Question: Should I cut my hair now that I am 50+?

Answer: Not unless you want to. If you are in a place in life where you want to experiment with something different, by all means, go for it. Try a new cut or color, try going grey, you can always change it if you don’t like it. I like to think of these middle years as a renaissance—a time for change, experimentation and growth.

Question:. Is my hair too long for my age?

Answer: If you love the length, and your hair is healthy, by all means keep it long. If your hair is thinning, or you have a lot of breakage, you may want to consider a shorter cut—I had mine shorter while I waited for the color damage to grow off, and I trim my hair frequently when the ends look too thin. The main thing to consider is the health of your hair. And how it suits your face and overall silouette.

Question:. How can I determine what style is right for me?

Answer:. Consider your life style, the climate where you live, how easy it is for you to care for your hair and what you really like in terms of style. So here are some notes from my life:

I have fine, straight hair and I live in Florida where it is quite humid. Having short hair is a complete pain for me because it requires daily styling, tons of hair spray and styling aids and it goes flat within minutes in humid weather. I couldn’t wait to grow my hair out, but was stuck for years in a vicious circle of styling and color damage so I kept having to cut off the damage which kept it in a hideous old lady hairstyle. I like being able to put my hair up when it’s humid, and during the winter, my long hair needs very little in the styling department. For me, longer hair works. For you, it may be the complete opposite.

Question: Should I color my grey?

Answer: It used to be that no one wanted the slightest hint of grey hair. I have friends who actually tweezed out their grey hair one at a time—which seems a bit extreme these days, but everyone seemed to be terrified at any signal they were getting the slightest bit older.

Today women can and should choose what ever color they like. A few months ago, I let my color grow out a bit to see how it would look “natural” , and decided that for now, I’ll continue to color and occasionally highlight. I envy women who look amazing in their silvers and salt and pepper tresses. I look like a dirty mouse in my natural color. When choosing a hair color, keep in mind the health of your hair. (Over processed damaged hair never flattered anyone.) Otherwise your options are unlimited.

Question: Do you want to say anything else about “old lady hair” or style rules?

Answer: My only “rule” is this: We need to find what works for us individually. It is a completely personal thing. We need to stop trying to hold each other to rules and stop judging each other for not making the same choices we make. There is nothing I detest more than hearing someone make a choice that works great on them, then turn around and judge others for not making the same choice. God made us all different. We should be sharing our unique gifts and celebrating the uniqueness our friends bring into the world rather than trying to make each other the same.

A few of my secret “must haves” for healthy hair:

Thank you so much for stopping by! I’d like to invite you to follow along with our newsletter, Your Invitation is Here   You will get my 6 Pillars of Skin Care Guide—Get your glow on with the products you already have at home (I do throw in a list of my favorites in case you are curious). We’re also going strong on the Sharingajourney Facebook Page where you’ll meet amazing women and if you love Pinterest, please feel free to join our group board and give me a follow.

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Beautiful hair is easier than you think with Nina from Sharing A Journey

By: Nina · In: Beauty, Hair · Tagged: hair care, hair care for women over 50

About Nina

Sharing A Journey is an award winning blog for women "of a certain age" who love life and style with a little inspiration mixed in. The blog and it's author Nina Anders has been featured in notable publications including Forbes, Next Avenue, Thrive Global and Parade. Photos by RSEsteyphotography Let's do midlife together!

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Julie says

    02/07/2018 at 8:58 PM

    I love this post! I’m 46, and my hair has always been super dry and naturally curly. My hair was heavily gray in my 20’s. As a natural redhead, I had to find a color that is closest to my natural color or just look crazy. My hair grows super fast, so in less than 3 weeks, I have a white streak down my part! The joys of aging!

    Reply
  2. Gwen Allen says

    02/09/2018 at 10:06 AM

    [* Shield plugin marked this comment as “trash”. Reason: Failed GASP Bot Filter Test (checkbox) *]
    I love this article Nina! My mother has been bugging me to cut my long hair since I was about 35…she was certain it was unprofessional, and now at 52, she is certain it is inappropriate. I’m keeping long hair as long as it stays thick enough to look great. Thanks for the tips for healthy hair.
    Gwen, Adrian Allen shoes

    Reply
    • Nina says

      02/10/2018 at 6:56 AM

      I’m with you Gwen, I will keep my hair long until I can’t! I’m not a fan of “rules”!

      Reply
  3. Donna says

    02/10/2018 at 11:37 AM

    This is an excellent post! At seventy, I find that my hair is thinning and just doesn’t have enough fullness to wear it long. Love the length of your hair and it does look very healthy. No matter the cut or style, healthy looking hair is key.

    Reply
    • Nina says

      02/10/2018 at 5:52 PM

      I’ve received some questions about thinning hair so I plan to ask my doctor about it since she has thinning hair and has been using something that has improved it. I’ll do another post if I get information that might help.

      Reply
  4. Mimi says

    02/10/2018 at 7:50 PM

    What a great post Nina. I just found you through Paulas linkup. I’m 58 too, and looking forward to embracing the years ahead as a fashion forward woman. I let my hair go silver a few years ago, and have never looked back. It’s in tip top shape, cut all one length just past my shoulders, and I recently invested in some heated rollers which have been a lot of fun. I’ve subscribed and look forward to more updates. Mimi xxx

    Reply
  5. Sheree Ho says

    02/15/2018 at 1:16 PM

    [* Shield plugin marked this comment as “trash”. Reason: Failed GASP Bot Filter Test (checkbox) *]
    What a wonderful post, Nina. Thank you for sharing with us.

    xo, Sheree
    poshclassymom

    Reply
  6. Deborah Shadovitz says

    07/01/2018 at 6:19 PM

    [* Shield plugin marked this comment as “trash”. Reason: Failed GASP Bot Filter Test (checkbox) *]
    Great article. I love that you point out that our hair is a reflection of our body’s health. Hair health starts on the inside.

    Reply
    • Nina says

      07/08/2018 at 9:25 AM

      Thank you! Live and learn, right? I was having two problems, one, my hair was being severely over processed and the second was a thyroid issue. Together—what a huge mess! Glad to have it back on track and, glad to be able to share. Thank you so much for stopping by!

      Reply
  7. Jodie says

    07/03/2018 at 10:57 AM

    It’s so nice that we have so many options!! I always think that hair is such a great accessory for most women!!
    XOXO
    Jodie
    http://www.jtouchofstyle.com

    Reply
  8. Maria | Passion fruit, Paws and Peonies says

    07/03/2018 at 2:17 PM

    So much useful and grounded advice. My hair has been breaking terribly lately so I have had a grown-out fringe cut in. It looks much healthier – and the right products have really helped xx

    Reply
  9. Jonet Wooten says

    07/03/2018 at 4:24 PM

    Thanks for the great hair tips, my friend. Mature hair does require a little extra TLC.

    Xo, Jonet

    Reply
  10. Kellyann Rohr says

    07/03/2018 at 7:10 PM

    I enjoyed reading this. You’re so right, my hair is thinner, drier, and on top of all of that I live in a very humid climate so styling is rough! Healthy hair makes all the difference!

    Reply
  11. Ruth says

    07/04/2018 at 1:09 AM

    Great tips and sharing your experience! I have gray hair and white hair right now in my mid 30s. It’s literally all over. Most people don’t notice it until they’re up close because it looks like highlights. My dad has the best gray hair and I’m hoping I have his genes with my hair!

    Reply
  12. Julie Caron says

    07/04/2018 at 5:32 PM

    [* Shield plugin marked this comment as “trash”. Reason: Failed GASP Bot Filter Test (checkbox) *]
    I totally love that you still have long hair. I’m 49 and I do to…. don’t plan on cutting it any time soon. It does get dry easier now so I try to be careful about the products I use on it and I don’t wash it every day like I did when I was younger.

    Reply
    • Nina says

      07/08/2018 at 9:15 AM

      I’ve always been happier with long hair! I’ve had it short for several years and always feel less attractive as well as having huge struggles keeping it looking good everyday. I don’t know how some women manage to have fine short hair perfectly styled all the time. It never, ever worked for me.

      Reply
  13. Cynthia says

    07/11/2018 at 3:48 PM

    [* Shield plugin marked this comment as “trash”. Reason: Failed GASP Bot Filter Test (checkbox) *]
    Excellent advice!

    Reply
  14. Cynthia says

    07/11/2018 at 3:49 PM

    [* Shield plugin marked this comment as “trash”. Reason: Failed GASP Bot Filter Test (checkbox) *]
    Excellent advice!

    Reply

Trackbacks

  1. 6 Amazing Hair Care Secrets for Women 50+ | Sharing A Journey says:
    07/15/2020 at 3:16 PM

    […] Research.  Google became my friend.  I took a deep dive into learning how to care for damaged hair, what products to use and what to avoid. You can read about my favorite products and exactly what I did to nurse my hair back to health.Here […]

    Reply
  2. Grey Hair for a Day: Should You Dye Your Hair After 50? | Sharing A Journey says:
    10/13/2020 at 3:21 PM

    […] The Secret to Beautiful Hair Over 50 Is Easier Than You Think […]

    Reply

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2025 is my year for a Glo Up starting with my skin 2025 is my year for a Glo Up starting with my skin care routine. I just started using the ZIIP Halo on my 65 year old skin.  Cant wait to see the results. #livingmybestlife #over60andfabulous #over50model #over65skincare @ziipbeauty
This week’s mini adventures had us in one of my This week’s mini adventures had us in one of my favorite spots-Dunedin Florida. We went for coffee and croissants at @dunedincoffeecompany where they have amazing coffee and a real in house bakery. Every so often the baker comes through with delicious creations right from the ovens. We went for some design inspiration @lrhome their shop never disappoints then on to the book shop. That made us hungry so we had to go to  @casatinas. How could you not?#livingmybestlife #over60andfabulous #over50womenoninstagram #over50style #outfitoftheday #over50model
I've been making a point to spend a lot less time I've been making a point to spend a lot less time on screens this year. It's been amazing how much free time I have to enjoy new hobbies and spending time with friends and family. I even tried my hand at painting with a Time For Art kit and actually made this sweet dolphin painting. I was surprised how easy it was even for someone like me who has very little painting experience. I loved how the kits came with everything I needed to make the painting, and I when I needed help, I watched a video on the Time for Art website. I thought it would be fun to host some friends for a girls painting night, invitations are in the mail--plus it would make a perfect gift. Be sure to check out @timeforartlive--I will link all their info in my link tree.
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