I had all over grey hair for a day. What I was going for and what I got were two different things. I wanted to blend my grey temples into my hair color instead of fighting it. What I got was a flat all over grey.
In case you are wondering what I was thinking, I have silver temples now, and I wondered if there would be a way to work with it instead of fighting it. I have colored my hair a “honey” blond for, gosh about five or six years, and have wanted to tone down the warmth just a touch as well as wanting to see if I could work with the silver.
If you are curious about the color, imagine my hair the color at the top with more grey added in. (No, I didn’t take pictures…)
Hairdressers have worked all sorts of magic (and voodoo) on my hair; and like most of us, I’ve had my share of horror stories which taught me that I need to be somewhat pro-active not only in learning to style and care for my hair, but also a little about color. I thought my hairdresser and I were on the same page.
Once home, I took a good look in the mirror, cried a bit then sat down with my computer to consider my next move. Should I spend another $200 and make another appointment with the stylist to see if he could reverse it? Should I see if I could remove the toner on my own? Should I try to completely re-color it myself? I am sure, Dear Readers that you can see a plethora of potential disasters lurking in this decision tree.
Rather than spend another $200, I opted to remove the ashy toner and apply a golden glaze with shine and conditioning at home for $35. I carefully worked with samples to see how long to leave the glaze on, and slightly warmed the color without damaging my hair.
In this exercise, I learned that I look and feel more like “me” with some warmth in my hair, but I am going to leave the silver at the temples. The experience was an important one for me. I wanted to decide whether it is time for me to go silver, and right now the answer is that it’s not. Many women look amazing in their silvers, but I am not one of them. It didn’t hurt to try it to see whether I liked it, even though it was a bit traumatic.
If you are curious how you might look with grey or silver, but don’t want to grow your hair out to see, here are a few tips:
How to see if grey hair will look good on you.
- Allow your hair to grow out a half inch or so so you can see how much grey or silver you have and what shade it is. This will give you a clue as to whether grey or silver is your jam.
- Try on a grey or silver wig to see if it suits as an all over color.
- Have your “colors” done to see if you have a warm or cool skin tone. If grey is one of the colors you look good in, having grey hair might be your jam.
- Work with your grey by adding highlights and low lights rather than going for an all over hair color.
Have you decided how you want to manage your grey hair? (Let me know your thoughts below!) I know there are lots of women out there who prefer to be completely natural, while others absolutely do not. I’ve noticed that once we’ve joined one camp or the other, we are less tolerant of those who have made a different decision. I hope we women will one day realize that it’s about what is inside our hearts that matter. I also hope that we will be able to appreciate that each of us is unique, and that uniqueness should be celebrated.
Are you interested in more on hair care for women over 50? Here are a few posts on how I nursed my hair back to health and was able to grow it long:
Video: Hair Care Essentials for Women Over 50The Best Luxury Hair Care Products for Fine Hair
The Secret to Beautiful Hair Over 50 Is Easier Than You Think
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I decided to go blonde (from dark brunette) when I hit the stage that I had to dye my hair every 10 days as I looked like a skunk. It’s much lower maintenance for me. I had thought about embracing the grey but I don’t feel ready for it yet. People still sometimes think I’m under 40 and I know that if I had grey hair nobody would ever think that again. I’m not ready yet to be grey. If my hair was all white (the back is still around 40% dark) I’d go for it, but I’m not keen on salt and pepper on me.
First, let me state that I have been inspired by so many of your thoughts. I am a 63 year old, who feels like 30.. but every so often “ reality” rears it’s ugly head!
I struggle with the fact , that there has to be more too life than the life I now live.. which is basically working out and being – God forbid, Retired! I have been looking for a job for over a year now, but know my age is the deciding factor in many of the positions..you have encouraged me too keep plugging along..
But I digress, …I’m writing as I gave my self a 50th Birthday gift and went cold turkey on coloring my hair after 30t years..
Too say it took a LONG time to get used too and accept, is an understatement.. my husband still has less grey than I do!
What I find interesting, are the numerous women who tell me how much they like my hair, would love to do it, but just cannot take the plunge..
One of the motivators for me, was how society accepts men with silver hair ( “ so distinguished!”), while women are expected to work at looking the same forever..
Oh well, just my thoughts.. good luck with which ever way you go.
Maryanne
Thank you so much for your post here. If I looked good with grey hair, I would definitely keep it, but the ashy tone just doesn’t look good against my skin. Perhaps when I get more it will be a different situation. I am certainly not opposed…
I love my grey, and you couldn’t pay me to color again! That said, my coloring is naturally cool. Since embracing my grey, I’ve been told I look younger than I did with my colored hair. My darker hair no longer suited my softening complexion. If coloring is you jam, I tell clients to run with it… The biggest issue I see is women whose colorists want to “warm them up” when their coloring doesn’t suit it at all!
What color do you think I should ask for when I go back? I was thinking of just a few highlights in the front but I messed up with the whole grey idea—as I said in the post, when I left the salon it had an ashy tint which really looked BAD. I’m not sure what to do now.
I will be 60 on the 24th. I will be dying my hair until at least 80. I will go down kicking and screaming. Highlights and extensions. My hair is so thin.